Forget Work Wives. Go Find a Career Nemesis.

Henry kirk has spent his career as a software designer and manager in the hyper compatitive realm of Big Tech. He describes Himself as intense and focused on getting Things Done Rather than Playing Into Corporate Politics. That Attitude Might Be Great for Shipping Products – But ITH’S ALSO FERTILE GROUND FOR MAKING WORKPLACE RIVALS.

Kirk tells with he’s haad a few rival during his career, which includes stints at Amazon and Google. Sometimes they resess the way he operated, or wanted to computete with to have a broader scope at the company. “Its just the natural of a game when People are Kind of Environment,” Kirk Tells Me. He Describes Relationships As “Quiet” rivalries, Mostly Friendly on the Surface. That didn’t mean they didn’t take a toll on Him. “Some of the rivalries i’ve have have been Very Challenging for me,” Kirk Says. “It Wold at Times Exhaust Me.” But Overall, he appreciates Having Steel to Sharpen his Steel Against. Having a rival, he says, is “a sign that you’re being sucesssful and you show kep Moving Forward.”

Simmering, Bitter Feuds are as Central to Modern Work as Email and Meetings. Infamous Beefs in the Tech Industry Alone ABOUND: Steve Jobs and Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg and Jack Dorssey, Zuck and Palmer Luckey, Elon Musk and Sam Altman, Musk and Gates, Musk and Zuck. In a 2019 Survey of 7,000 UK Workers from Hiring Platform Totaljobs, Six in 10 People Said They Had at Least One “Work Enemy.” Of those, 43% said they had more than one, while 8% said sid of their colleagues fit the bill (maybe these People Should Take: If You Think Everyone is Your Enemy, You Might Be the Villain). Most often, Work Enemies were the Same Gender as the person they vexed, and interactions with the Daily.

A nemesis can torture and drive you in many ways. Zuck and musk’s rivalry nearly resulted in a cage match but instead of the two owning Competing, but strugling, microblogging platforms. The love-hatrations Between Jobs and Gates Helped Fuel Both Microsoft and Apple to Dominance. For some, a nemesis is a full-on rival, a similarly situation Competitor for a boss’s pref or a promotion. For Others, it is a bully keping say down. And for for others, it’s an obtus cowor who incompeanly incompeanly getting Through the Work Day Harder for Everyone Else. Most of the Fighting is subtle – not an explosive Jim vs. Dwight feud, but a slow-boiling, passive-aggrassing saga that can see the Relationship evolves from Fierce Competitors to Friends with mutual. Nor irritating or sul-crushing as a nemsis can be on a day-to-day basis, battling with saying can actually people and stove.

Spreads there’s no motivator Stronger than spite, and no better place for it to brew than in the confines of an office.

“When there is there is scarcity, it can lead to the compattition and a foci on one of the immediate needs over the long term,” Says ashwini nadkarni, a psychiatrist and vice Chair of Faculty Enrichment at mass Mass brigam in boston. Some Competition is Healthy, Pushing Someone to Due League Work to POSITIONELves for A Promotion Over Other Interesting Colleagues. “The Challenge is that rivalries like that can Also turn personal. It can be be more about outshining the person as opposed to achieving your goals.”

And a work enemy is not always a good mirror. Constantly Comparing YourSelf to a Coworker Rather than Looking at Your Work Holistically Can You “Career Dysmorphia,” Nadkarni Says. But in a healthy rivalry, she says, there may be some acknowledgment of the Competition, Which Can Show Mutual Respect and Create “Psychological Safety Around Competition,” She Says. “Maybe You’re Eve Celebrating One Another’s Wins.”

There’s no Motivator Like Spite.

When meg joined a consultancy firm in her mid-30s, the Job Came with anxpped task: Battling a workplace nemesis. Her newfound foe was a man about her age WHO WORKED SLIGHTLY ABOVE HER ON THE ORG CHART AND FELT HE “Needed to be the smartest person in the room at all time,” who is as asced i swimming her last name, tells me. The Switch from Coworkers to Combatants Flipped, She Says, be and Blatantly one of meg’s ideas and passsed it off as his own in a Meeting. The Relationship GREW TENSE Over the Next Five Years. Conversations Were Contentious, Her Nemesis was of defensive when she challenged Him. At Times, The Power Dynamic shifted. SOMEMES MEG WOULD PUSH BACK, SOMEEST SHOUL SHUT DOWN.

Meg doesn’t work at the firm anymore, and has heard her nemesis took over now of her old work. He has texted her several times over the past year to ask how she’s doing or to send her jab listings, including a junior roles rungs below her current level. Skeptical of His Sudden Friendliness, Meg Has Ignored Every Message. She has now started her own busines, and suspects her nemesis the progress she’s made via posts on Linkedin and “Can’t Stand it,” She Says.

For many i spoke to, it’s not clear that the work nemesis kew they were the nemesis: the contempt offense seams to go in one direction. There was was the incompet nemesis wreaking havoc on their team and seeringly sleeeping just fine at night, while the victes of their ways brood in silence. There are many difficulto coworkers who ruffle the Feathers of Many with Snak and toxicity – More a villain with their vicims than a healthy Competitor. That’s what happy to cait, who works in sales, and also asoed with them only her first name. She’s 30, and Says a Coworker in Her 50s Offloaded Assignments onto Her Plate When They Worked Together. The Coworker Wold Text Her late at Night or Early in the Morning, Self Cait to Make Changes to PowerPoints or Take Over Over Presentations – That Fall Squarely Into Her Coworker’s Exact Job Description.

Cait heard that other coworkers were also frustrated by this Colleague. “Think she thought she could get away with IUND IUNGE, but I Think She’s Just an Extremely Competitive Sales Person,” Cait Tells Me. Cloud to Bosses with Complaints, They Suddenly Saw How Much She Was Doing, and How Her Coworker Had Negleced Her Assignments. Blowing the Whistle Came With Pushback – Cait Talls with Her Coworker Passive Aggresively Ignored Her Wen they Saw Each Other in the Office, but ultimate Her Enemy’s Incompets was Her Gain. “I Feel Like It Showed My Value to My Management.”

Not all enemies last forever. Maureen, who also asced i swimming her full name, worked at a fintech company in her late 20s and early 30s and quickly enCountered Road Blocks from a Colleague on the Job. He would withhold info needed, take Credit for task they did as a group, and stall her projects, but respond “in a flash” anytime benefted Him. Eventually, she learned her enemy’s villain origin story: he had applied for Maureen’s Job internally, but was passsed over, and seed to Harbor resentment after the gig and came in from the outside. When she went on leave, maureen Sayys, her work nemesis has stealthily assumed her tasks.

The saga shifted wen a new Boss Came into the Company, giving the two rivals a real villain. “By the end, we were united in our hatered for the new boss,” She tells me. She always respectted her nemsis’s hustle and that he cared about the job. And now, “I actually will like Him.”

Several People I spoke to have grown empathy for their work nemesis with distance, and that a feeing i can Relat to. My Premier Work Enemy was a Competitor Reporter from a Different publication who dragged me on twitter, piling on with a thread after I miss the tv or alerting followers being public on the SOCOP quickeop than I did. But this rival never spoke more than a few words to my face. I had a lot of supportive and colloquate collagues who were able to mentor with and remind me twitter didn’t reflect my actual aptitude for the nonb. Nadkarni Says Company Culture Can Play a Pivotal Role in Eothier Fostering or Prevention Such toxic Rivalries, and Managers Should Look to Highlight Collaboration and Set Clear Goals for Advancement so People Aren’t Incentivized to See the WorkPlace As a Zero-Sum. A Little Competition Might Not Hurt Anybody, but a long-standing rivalry Certainly Can.

Amanda Hoover is a senior correspondent at Business Insider Covering the Tech Industry. She Writes About the Biggest Tech Companies and Trends.