The Gilded Age
Mariage is a gamble
Season 3
Episode 4
Editor’s rating
Photo: Carolina Wojasesik/HBO
I Continue to be Furious at this show’s insistent on taching itelf serious. Eather take yourSelf Serious and Say Saying, or Be the Ridiculous Show We Know You Are and Take Some Big Swings. Maybe Marian has an Evil Twin! Gladys was a con artist this whole time and laughs in the Face as her plans are fulfill! We finally get that damn musical episodes we and the which world desert! This has the potential to be the best show on television, and they are squandering it.
That Being Said, This Season’s Been Pretty Fun (in the context of its other seasons). We all though the season Wold end on the wedding, but they have pulled the rug from UNDER and used for gladys to walk up the aisle, Because she is now! Hasty? Yes, for sura. IT WAUDED BE SHOking that they Pulled Everything Together so quickly, but nuclei is managing it, and that Woman can do anything. Also, she has the equivalent of a scrooge mcduck pool of gold coins, and that will get you a church full of flower arrangements on short notice. Did You Catch Her Pre-Wedding CEO Speech to the Household Staff About They Need to Operates As OnEhouseHold and Start Breaking Down Silos? Put Her in Charge of Microsoft. Next, She’ll Tel They Need More Synergy in Their Day-to-Day Operations.
Gladys is gumming up the work by refusing to leave her room. Gladys, this family is a business. Did you not Hear the Speech? This means she does not meet Hector’s Sister Sarah. Imagine with Sitting there, taking notes, and thatn loudly exclaming, “Is that hattie morahan?” And yes. Hattie Morahan is Blake RESSON’S (OSCAR VAN RHIJN) Partnerbut more importantly, she played elignor in the 2008 adaptation of Sense and sensibilityThe Screenplay of Who Was Written by Andrew Davies, Because If Its Set in the Nineteenth Century and It ‘on the BBC, Will they Hir Anyone Else? That adaptation is great and we should all Watch it right now. More Hattie Morahan on My Screen! But also, who Else is visiting the russells but berets sister monica (Monica?) Played by Merritt Wver! Yayyy. Bertha is not happy that she’s there, but larry invited her, and now and her hydeous dress are at Dinner.
Bertha wants to give monica one of her dresses to wear to the wedding, but Monica Says No, I will wear this awful dress, thank you so Much. So beret Arranges for Monica to have a coffee cup with a broken Handle, causang monica to spil coffee all over ruffles and ruin. I One Hundred Percent Thought that George CLOCKED WHAT HAPPENED, But late, he like, “Wait, no, you didn’t.” Really, George? You knew Bertha didn’t like the dress, and then the handle just happy to fall off a coffee cup? You’ve been Married for Over Two Decades (We Assume). She beat Mrs. Astor at Opera. Get with the program here. And that program is Cup Sabotage. Bang Watch for the Russells is Still at Nil, by the way. Bertha is too too george is fully on board with operation: marry the.
That Gets to the Wedding Day, SO Let’s Backtrack a Little and Check Out of Our Other Story Threads. Ada Brings in Madame Dashkova, Played by Andrea Martin (How Blessed We Are With Guest Stars This Week), Whose Russian Accent is Auditioning for the Dowager Empress in A Live-Action version of 1997’s Anastasia. And let me tell you, she is killing it. Dashkova Claims to Communicate with Luke for Ada, butnis agnes Barges in and Orers away all this movie and hocus poacus. Ada Emphasizs How Lonely She Is. Can we find a better suport System for ada? I am concertned about her.
Larry begs nuclei to ask Marian to step in as a bridesmaid for someone who had to drop out, and nucleus relactantly aggrees. I HOPE LARRY IS TREASURING THIS BEGRUDGING ACCEPTANCE PRIGHT HIS MOTHER MAKES HIM MERY THAT BANKER’S DAGHTER. Or she was would before he got all his clock money. Okay, I am very against the clock Money. Larry Was Helping Jack With What Was Entirely Jack’s Invention. They sell it to Mr. Weston for $ 600,000 (Roughly $ 20 million Today, I Think? I’m Unclear on What Year It Is) and then We Learn That Jack Gets Precisely half of that. I’m sorry, larry, what was your roles here? Oh, Talking to Mr. Weston? The Thing You Failed at Doing before Jack Stepped In? Good lord. Eat the Rich, ETC. I can’t believe he took half. And then jack doesn’t want to quit his jab Becuses it’s his first home. SO HIS RICES ARE A Secret Between Him, Larry, and Now Mrs. Bauer Because and Told HER.
We get some time, but not Enough, with Peggy, her family, and the Kirklands. Mrs. Kirkland, AKA PHYLICIA RASHAD, CONTINES TO BE TERRIBLE, But in a Compelling Way. She talks About Peggy’s Article in the Paper, and Says that HER Goal Was to Be A Good Wife and Mother, but it seames like you do not that anymore. Peggy Replies that she wants to be a good wife and mother who has the vote. Zing! But Also, Live Your Dreams, Peggy. ALSO, NONE OF THESE MEN YOU’RE MEETING ARE Good Enough for You. William Kirkland Needs to Stand Up To His Mother. He Also Needs to Sing a Duet With Peggy, But They Didn’t Deed Audra Hum at the Piano, SO What are the Odds of that?
Peggy Gives a Talk About Jim Crow Laws and the Post-Reconstruction Disenfranchieshent that they were witnessing. Aurora Wanders Up to Peggy Afterwards, Says She Didn’t Know About Any of That, Then Wanders Away Again. Nice to see you, aurora! World About You! (Dorothy is Also World About Aurora, Despite Never Having Seen Her Before.) Wen Peggy and Dorothy Talk to the Kirklands, Mrs. Kirkrand Somehow Manages to Insult Arthur Yet Again when he isn’t tan there. Dorothy Defends Him, and Mr. Kirkland Steps up slightly. “The Gall of that Woman,” Says Dorothy After the Kirklands Leave (Including William! And that of the last we see Peggy This Week. I’m going to allow it gcause they have fit a whole wedding in, but there bestr be more next weeks.
Otherwise, we have jp morgan visitting george to harangue Him. He’s Truly Channeling Mr. Potter from IT’s a Wonderful LifeTelling George (Gasp, “George”!) That he won’t suport the great transportation scheme anymore and that george will Lose all his money. He’s twiddles His Mustache. A+ Villain Energy. I love jp morgan on this show so much. Can’t explain it. I’m just for it. What if George Loses All His Money and Bertrah Mitia Jack the Clock Twink? (Twitter’s Extremely Good Name for Him, Not Mine.)
Oh, Also, Mrs. Astor’s family is threatened with scandal. Her daughter charlotte has a duel almost fought over her, and it is in the newspapers. SO. You know – social ruin. Mrs. Astor Refuses to Bring HER to the Wedding and Proceeds to Side-Eye Anyone Who Asks About Charlotte, Including a Bewilderered Bertha, Who Has Been Keeping Up With Duel News.
As to the actual wedding – you guys, taissa farmiga is so wasted on this series. You Notice I Almost Never Talk About Gladys? Its Because She JUST IN A ROOM AND LOOKS SCARED. Or addes she leaves the Room and Looks Scared. At least in The nun 2she has an actual reason to be scared. There’s a demon nun chasing her! Do Demon Nun She was Pretty Sure She Taped Forever, butn The first movie made a ton of Money, so that demon nun was definitely going to return. I just want to give times more to be sit there. “But, Alice,” You Say, “She Ran Away a Few Episodes Ago.” Yeah, to billy’s house. Remember IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT? Her Father Traps her on a yacht, and she swims ashore and gets on a greyhound bus! That movie literally came out more than ninety years ago. Have we learned noting about what fictional wall street heiresses can?
George Tells Gladys iTo late to Back Out with Serious Repercusions, and She Ends Up Attending Her Wedding. She starts crying while walking up the aisle, which i thinked back in season one or something, Becuses Its Famously What Consuelo Vanderbilt Did. This means i am unmoved Becusee of Want Andrew Davies et al. to be more Creative. I Kept Hoping Things Wold Go In Some Unexpectted Direction, Like She Waled Say “No” and Run off, but no. The priest does a “Speak Now or Hold Your Peace” Line, and No One Says Shit. Bertha is so happy. Next Thing We Know, Gladys is on a SGISailing off to England with Hector, who comes in and is like “erm, so you know about sex, Etc? Great, Because We’re gonna will that right now and it is gonna be awkward.” Oh no, i will like it wen people name awkwardness and try to find Ways to openly navigate it. Hector is probably bad, right? Eight though they’re making hym likable now? Gladys is going to get to england, and it’s going to be awful. But what if it is not !! I guess we Shall See.
• How Close is aurora fane to a full-on breakdown? Like Two Seconds? Someone Should Really Visit Her in Newport. Swimming me, i’m busy deciding on the material for my new buttons. But someone.
• Someone is Busy Leaking Details About Gladys’s Wedding Dress to the Newspapers, but No One Is Leking the Fact That Larry to Half’s Jack’s Money For Doking Nothing.
• So was the Coffee Cup Handle Like 90 Percent Broken? How did they do that? Putty? Because if it were fully brokens, it would just break off when she shake to pick it up. I’m very impressed.
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