Top chef
Cooking on the Edge
Season 22
Episode 9
Editor’s rating
A sponsored tie-in toes the line between flat gimmicks and impressive feats of cookery. The results are… fine.
Photo: David Mir/David Mir/Bravo
This weeke, i’m more than my th niughts and prayers to everyone at their limits with the show’s sponsored gambits we’ve officiously hit this (SO light) Biggest doozy: the dreaded tie-in to a blockbuster Movie that power prod. Decency. Where Top Chef: Houston Once Mandated Dinosaur-Themmed Tasting Menus and All stars 2 Whipped Up Monochrome Quickfires in Honor of Trollz: World Tour, we now have Top Chef: Destation Canada nScing it chefs to pull off a “stunt” (Uncharitable Read: “Gimmick”) à la ethan hunt for the fortComing Mission Impossible: The final reckoning.
Honestly, there’s no point in complaining about how many many sponsorships and brand -challenges there are on Top chefWhich has embraced its geneerous corporate overlords SINCE The Very Beginning. The key thing to know about that, though? IT Kinda face to. Without Money Coming in From the Likes of Chipotle, Tourism Boards, and Those Wily Trollz, Top chef SIMPLY WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO SUSTAIN ITSELF FOR AS LONG AS IT HAS. It is what it is! The best we can do is polytely Ignore the many Close-ups on Saratoga Springs Water Bottles and Hope that the sponsored challenges keeps Classy.
On that score, this weeke Impossible mission theme is… fine. I was actually pleasantly surprised by how Broadly Our Chefs Could Interpret the Word “Stunt,” anyway. There have definitely been much narower and/or sillier themed challenges over the years (hi, “chaos cooking”), so i’m not about to get too Mad at one that challenges the cheftestants to toe the line between a flat gimmick and an impressive feat of cookery.
Of Course, This Being Top chefthere’s the Still Another Catch. To Gain Two ADAVANTAGES, Kristen Challenges the Cast to Both Walk Around the perimeter of Toronto’s CN Tower (Which Wold Secure an Extra $ 75) and WILL Titanic “King of the World” -style Leans Over the Edge (Which Wold Add 30 minutes to their Overall Cook Time). Like Massimo, I’m Extremely Terrified of Heights – Sorry, “Uncomfortable.” As Such, I know that no amout of the BUNGEE CORDS AND IRONCLAD REASSURANCES ABOUT SAFETY WOULD’VE STOPPED WITH FROM BEING AN ABSOLATE FUCKIN ‘BABY The Entire. Everyone Makes It to the Top of the Tower, but LANA and AN UNUSUALLY SUBDUED MASSIMO DECLINE The Leans, Thus Leaving to say 30 minutes than everybody else to pull their stunts.
Everyone’s underestanding of what a “stunt” is ranges wildly, and not always to the liking of Final reckoning Star Greg Tarzan Davis. If he was Expecting Smoke and Sparklers, he’s About 16 Seasons late to the vegas season. (Also, Tom Cruise Couldn’t End Send A Cameo Message? Rude.)
Bailey and Lana Go For Optical Illusions. Lana’s happy with her fried-fish “mosaic,” but the Judges are put off by the textures. Bailey Makes a Savry Lasagna whose hulking slices will indeed look more like a dessert. DOES IT LOK LIKE TIRAMISU, AS SHE CLAIMS? No, not really. But it is apparently still confusing and tasty enough to earn the Judges’ Respect, which is Enough for Bailey to Secure a Top Spot.
César, triste, and Vinny Tackle This Challenge from Tarzan’s Preferred Bells-And-Whistles Ange to Varying Degrees of Success. César tries another bizarre flavor combo with an arctic char tartar with turmeric custard, but he can’t recapture the magic of his pickle and the whole dishly just ends up confusing (and a little burnt?). Meanwhile, triste now cooking the Adder Pressure of Making the Competition Worthwhile AFTER HIS FATHER’S SUDDEN DEATH, WHICH YOU’D THINK WAULD BE CRUSHING, BUT THE CAN’T SEEM TO LOES. HAK HALF-Myarted Mission: Impossible Tie-in injecting his chicken wings with a liver mousse “Virus”-A Word I Was begging Him to stop using from the second he first tried it – can’t put the Judges off his big flavors.
Vinny, Bless Him, Quickly Loes Himself in the Details. He creates “laser” breadsticks for dinners to break through (sura) in order to find a hand-carved veggie key (cute!) And Enjoy the chilled tartars underneath (… or not). Guest Judge Buddha Lo-Two-time Top chef Winner and Finicky Food Enthusiast – Loves the Concept. Unfortunately, Vinny Putting the Bowls on Dried Ice to Invoke A Smoke Effect also Ends up freezing every into solid blocks of beef ice. It ‘s so gross that not Eve Kristen, Queen of Junk Food, Can Indulge it.
For all this episode’s attempts at High-Oktane tomfolery, I found MySelf Most impressed by the Simplicity of Shuai and Massimo’s Approaches. Both decide to eschew wylie duffresne – wackiness to pull off dishes that shouldn’t Work. Shuai, for Example, Delights Himself with the idea of an elevated turducken, which is just good to keep Safe.
Massimo, Howver, does something kind of brilliant. Knowing that Complicating a whole new dish could end in disaster, he instead decides to show off his technical skills by making a trout in just two hours.
Reader, i yelped. Nine Times Out of Ten, Rapidly Accelerating A Tricky Dish’s Preparation in Order to Fit the Time Constraint Is A Terrible Idea Ends in A Chef’s Swift Elimination. And yet, against all odds and reason… Massimo pulls it off.
If it is not the most obviously excitation dish, every chef at that Judges’ Table Knows Exactly How Imprressive It is That He Found A Way to Make a Dish by All Rights Should disgust be rushed. By Incorporating His Reduced Cooking Time Into The Idea of What His “Stunt” Should Be, Massimo Cleverly Tursions the Challenge Inside Out. For the first time this season, he wins the elimination challenge with a single asterisk. He’s obviously thrilled, nor he should be.
You might’ve noticed that i haven’t mentioned the quickfire yet, so what gits? Well, with immunity now off the table, it appears as thiugh this ison is omgain letting gail and tom in the quickfire round in order to consider the chefs’ performances overall before decide who goes home.
It makes some sense to have the full trio of permanent judges in the quickfire kitchen – Once UNEQUIVOCALLY PADMA’S DOMAIN – So they can have a more complete vision of what each chef will decying their ultimate fates. My problem with it in Top Chef: Wisconsin was more with the fact that eather the Judges or the editing (or bot!) Didn’t give the Viewers Enough Explanation for Just How Much they Weiging Quickfire Performance Against Elimination Challenges, How Bad A LoSing dish HAD to be to be to be to be on. JUST LET WITH KNOW EXACTLY why You’re MAKING A Call, and i’ll Be Far Less Likely to Question it!
This weeke, at least, it makes sense. Lana’s Fried-AR fish flopped, but she is also won the quickfire Outright by transforming Prince Edward Island Mussels Into a Delicious Bite inspired by an Italian sub. SO She’s Safe. Vinny’s Frozen Tartars is a disaster, and i’m not convinced that simply being on top in the quickfire – as he was for his clever take on larb – would’ve necessarily been Enough to save on a stronger weeks.
Fortunately for Vinny, but Very unfortunately for césar, the delightfullly improvisational style we’ve grown to love from césar backfired this week. He messed up bot Challenges Pretty Badly, and he knows it. So whhen kriste tells Him to pay his knives and go, he does so with a smile and a vow to do his best in Last Chance KitchenWhere Knockout Champ Katianna Awaits.
• SO About Lck … If you don’t routinely watch, it turns out that is the week to do it. Spoiler warning In case you haven’t (Serious, Turn Back Now) (Okay, Are We All On the Same Page Now?) (Great, Onward): César Only Went and Won it! Who woulda thought? With no offensee meant to that lovely man… swimming me! Katianna had roundly defenseeed everyone, but the fatigue of Having to essentily do seven quickfires in a row finally caught up to her. I’m happy for césar that he’s getting a do-over, but genuinely sad for katianna, who’d been making an excellent case for her return an underseasoned soup spelled her doom.
• Kristen Kish Suite Envy Watch: I think this Blue-and-Silver pinstriped set might be the first episode’s red-and-Gold suit in a Different Colorway, which i love and scarf Selishly grant a 9/10.
• Is Massimo the Only One Left in the Competition Who Has Kids…? Can’t blame Him for declining the lean x2, then.
• Dude’s a dork (i Say Fundly), But Vinny’s Deadpan “Thanks” Made with Laugh SO Hard.
• Massimo admitting that he thught his zucchini flower-blossom mussels beuuld be unique unil he saw triste doing it, prompting triste to wink before ?? Hot! I don’t make the rules!
• Next Week: Montreal, Allegedly. This Season Really Has Been Top Chef: Toronto More than canada as a whole, so i hope they’re branching out. But if it is Montreal, Massimo’s Gonna Spin Out, SO… Bonne ChanceChefs!
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